Monday, January 17, 2011


I'm so lucky. Every day I think about how lucky I am.

My friend's mom just passed away. I still have my mom. I'm so lucky.

My sister called the other day. She said my mom had called her and now she should call me. At first I was worried. My initial thought was that something happened to my Grandmother. She hasn't been very well this year. I keep thinking I should call her, but something always comes up and I forget. So when I thought something might have happened I was very mad at myself for not calling, but then I know my Grandma would understand how life gets in the way. She always understands. Luckily, it had nothing to do with her and I can still call her. I will call her. I'm so lucky to have her.

My husband. I think the world of him, did you know that? Ask me about him and I'll gush. I don't like to brag or rub it in, but I'm really very lucky.

I don't have any children. Think that's unlucky? You may not understand this, but I have all my free time to myself. I can paint. I can clean, or not clean. If I'm sick, I can stay in bed. I can shower as long as I want. I can drink alcohol if I want. I can eat whatever I want for dinner, and take as much time as I want to prepare it. I don't have to go to soccer games, or appointments that aren't for me, or school meetings... I clean up after myself only (and sometimes my husband). I can spend my money on me if I want to. I can go out without worrying about a babysitter. Don't get me wrong, I love kids and would like to have my own. But not now. The older I get the more greedy I get with my time. I don't like doing things I don't want to do, and I don't have to do them. I'm very lucky. Selfish maybe. But lucky too.

On that note, I have time. I'm so lucky I've had the time to paint my house. I've had time to paint pictures. I've had time to sketch. I've been planning the renovation we'll one day do on our kitchen. I've had time to feel creative, and explore this creative side of myself. And at the end of the day, I don't have to pack it all up and hide it in a closet. I have space! What luck!

I have a house. Every day this house becomes more like home and I love it a little bit more. I'm so lucky.

I have food on my table. Not just Kraft Dinner. In fact, I don't even eat Kraft Dinner now. We can have very nice meals at home. I don't have to budget carefully to make sure we have food on the table every day... And we can go out to eat when we want. To nice restaurants if we want, or just for fast food. Or for $2.99 breakfast specials, my favourite..

I have a car. Every day my husband takes it to work and I'm stuck at home. But it's my car really. I could drive him to work if I really wanted.
I have good friends. I wouldn't say I have a lot of friends, but I have a few very good friends. They remember my birthday. They can tell when I'm having a bad day. They call just to check in. They understand me. I'm so lucky to have such great friends.

I thought this winter would be very difficult. I thought being so far away from my friends, my family, and the place I knew as home would be incredibly tough. I imagined I'd spend the winter depressed and feeling alone. But instead I've found myself counting my blessings every day, and being much more appreciative of what I do have. I've surprised myself. Instead of focusing on the negative, I can't get out of my head how lucky I have been. I'm so lucky!

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